I’ve long decided to avoid any book of memoir that only intends to say, “look at how fucked up I am,” or, “look what an asshole I am.” Their misplaced and gratuitous narcissism nauseates me. I thought this book would be different. While I've never been tempted to read Belle de Jour and its likes, the memoir of a professional dominatrix sounded intriguing. I wasn’t interested in why some men pay to subject themselves to pain and humiliation, but was more trying to see what kind a woman does that

Disapointing. The author is a better interview subject than writer. I heard part of a Terry Gross interview and was intrigued enough to buy this memoir of a dominatrix. I suppose, anyone who writes a memoir is--by default--self-absorbed, but there's precious little in here about being a dominatrix and quite a lot about being a self-deluded drug addict.BTW, if you've always thought you'd enjoy stomping about in heels and brandishing a whip...be prepared for enemas and catheters as well. Why? This...

I contemplated one star, but she does have a few insightful moments. What springs to mind first is the vanity on display in the book. Someone holds herself in very high regard. (which, despite what a commenter on another review says, is NOT the same as being proud of one's self) There were moments when I caught myself thinking that if I were to unfortunately find myself trapped in conversation with her, I'd need an icepick for my ear-drums.What comes to mind next is that it frequently felt like

I picked this up because of the Terri Gross interview on NPR and have to say that the interview was more compelling than the book.I really don't go for a lot of self-reflection from situations that are extremely avoidable, and I also found it irritating how the author seemed to switch between the tone of the memoir and into an academic register. She talked about being an anthropologist in her own life at the time, which I found to be sort of an unnecessary device to describe how we are all aware...

I wanted so badly to like this, to be completely engrossed by it. I didn't, and I wasn't.

A really irritating woman talking about an interesting subject. Her narcissism and genuine disdain for everything and everyone she encounters takes all the fun out of it. Not cute. Plus several of the people I know who are current or former sex workers have very valid bones to pick with the way she represents a lot of the work, her fellow sex workers, and the clients. If you are at all interested in kink, do not turn to this book as a window into the world. Too much is inaccurate, dangerous, sex...

Funny that I should read two "female domination" books back-to-back, but maybe that's because I purchased them together. The other book -- a novel -- Permanent Obscurity by Richard Perez -- was everything this was not: hilarious and down-and-dirty -- and not meant to be serious "literary" like this one. I liked this book mostly, though I found the writing to be forced and self-consciousness -- like something a fan of Anais Nin would write. There are genuine moments though, and I think this autho...

The writing is decent, but the author's contempt and disgust with her chosen profession ruined the book entirely for me. I picked it up thinking I would be getting an autobiography of a dominatrix who liked her job, or if not her job, at least her clients. Febos instead gave me a claustrophobic trip inside her last few years of drug abuse and a heaping helping of scorn for and judgment about submissives in general, her own personal clients in particular. I get that it's her own story, and true t...

Kudos to the author for having the balls to write this memoir. I'm sure her story is not received lightly everywhere. Tho it is 2010, a lot of people still prefer to live in the dark ages, or prefer that WOMEN live in the dark ages. For the author to just go out there and write a book and say, I was a dominatrix and I enjoyed it sometimes and I did heroin as well.. gutsy.It is an interesting memoir. It takes readers to the nitty gritty world of S&M and tells just how far people go to get satisfa...

I was intrigued when I heard the interview on NPR; after reading her book I can say without question she is a much better interviewer than she is writer. Whip Smart is clearly the result of a pretty face, an interesting job, and an absolutely AMAZING publicist. Given her career choice I’m apprehensive to use the word boring; perhaps she was so mentally removed from her own story, her own apathetic voice was the only thing that resonated with me. I wanted to hear more about her days, and this mys...

The depiction of her one Asian colleague was so repugnantly racist that I couldn’t go on

heard a tiny bit of Febos' interview on NPR and was intrigued enough to find and listen to it in full. look forward to reading her book. i'm really not sure how to rate this book, so i'm giving it 3. i could go either up or down a star. i can agree with all the points other reviewers have made. self indulgent, brutally matter of fact. am i just annoyed with the happily-ever-afterness of the end? some of the disjointedness of the sections/writing? definitely some good and enlightening passages th...

Great read! Thoughtfully & vividly written. I'm only half way thru & am enthralled.

Three and a half? Three and three-quarters? Whip Smart was really interesting and, in fact, pretty smart. The author is very articulate, even if you might find her hard to relate to, or like. I had personal revelations of my own while reading it, mostly tangential to the book, but I don't think they would have been quite so clear without the sharp writing.That said, it does devolve from time to time into maudlin introspection and emotional flogging (no pun intended) that can be difficult to trea...

I heard about this memoir on NPR and from the interview, it sounded quirky and a bit more fun-spirited. The actual book was a complete downer. The author's drug addiction didn't interest me and her experiences in "the dungeon" were disgusting (and I'm NOT a prude by any means)and twisted. I guess I didn't realize quite how much sexual contact was involved in being a dominatrix or how much brutal violence and bloodshed. I'd kind of assumed that the whole S&M thing was pretty much a mind trip feat...

In a recent "Studio 360" interview, Mary Karr, responding to a remark about the influence her memoir "The Liar's Club" has had on the publishing world, said that there are a lot of bad memoirs out there that she just wasn't responsible for.I'm afraid "Whip Smart" might just be another of those memoirs.Who would think that a memoir about a college student moonlighting as a professional dominatrix could be . . . boring? But, to me, "Whip Smart" was just that. In fact, by comparison to the life pre...

I have to appreciate any woman who tells a story like this without saying, "Look, look what happened to me," but rather "I got seduced by a world that is less glamorous than it seems." OK, so much for literary analysis, but hey, I'm not in the business of that. I'm in the business of reading memoir for pleasure, and while I can't deny the craft of the thing, I did enjoy Febos' story because it felt genuine above all else. Admittedly, this is a book I thought I might relate to long before I read

Finally got around to reading this - I bought a copy when Febos came to the Olympia library. And of course, the insight into the world of the dungeons and deeds of the professional dominatrix is fascinating. But what I was really impressed me was the honest way Febos exposed herself, deconstructed the world, and discussed the complexity of life. I especially identified with her relatively trauma-free childhood, her disdain for innocence, her intelligence. Fascinating, and it made me seriously th...

This book had me whipped, seriously.The memoir of a professional dominatrix humiliating and punishing a wide variety of paying male customers in a dark seedy cavernous basement establishment in New York City would be, you'd think, a rather interesting book. As it happened, I floundered and foundered badly with it. For me, it never achieved any kind of momentum. Febos seems to think that giving details of having tea and scones and the like is how a writer lends balance and adds atmospheric detail...

This beautifully composed book stands out not just because of the subject, and the author's sensitive, inquisitive, analytical, and sympathetic review of her life, but also because Febos is careful not to skip the stories beneath the story. She talks about truth/lying, doesn't gloss over or over-dramatize her struggle with addiction, takes us through her family's reaction to her job (carefully, it seems; I got the feeling that Febos was trying to permit her family as much privacy as possible wit...