The Elastic Snapped

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WARNING: This book may contain traces of nuts and may also cause drowsiness amongst those unfamiliar with the English language. Bibliophobia sufferers may experience severe panic attacks. Additionally, it is strongly recommended that you do not drive whilst reading.

INGREDIENTS: Lunacy, stupidity, silliness, idiocy, absurdity, aberration, eccentricity and fragments of appallingly bad taste.

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Notwithstanding the above, within this tome you will discover Agatha Christie’s long lost short story, ‘The Elastic Snapped’, the superheroes ‘Pac A Mac Man & Galoshes Boy’, the ‘Swoony Sayings from The Young Buddha’, ‘Alfred Outwhaite’s Pedigree Homing Earwig’, ‘Naomi Wholemeal the Useless Radicalized Eco Warrior & Poet’ and how Noah came to feast upon ‘Unicorn Sausages’.

Moreover, there are real life tales and aspects of history that you were likely never told of at school, such as ‘The Rolling Pin that Saved The British Empire’, the construct of a ‘Young Leonardo Da Vinci’s Lightsabre’ and of how the ‘Yanks Airbrushed the British Moon Mission from the History Books’ and much, much more.

By way of examples, were you ever aware of ‘Pocahontas’ Lost Dr Martens’ or the day Billy Joel suffered from ‘Lyricist’s Block’? If your answer is ‘no’ then this is the book for you.

If perchance you’re familiar with the first book of silly skits, ‘Fanny, I Think of You Often’ then you’ll already be aware of some of the mad characters in this sequel. If not, then it matters not a jot for this is a standalone spin-off.

So what are you waiting for? Read on...